Apparently I’m that Fool

Thanks to all of you who have been following me over at Jimz Shorts during the last few weeks. I’ve enjoyed crafting slightly longer posts and am mostly pleased with the early material. Perhaps my goal of posting twice a week was a bit ambitious but I’m doing my best and I’m content with that.

After I posted my first story at the new site my wife Christiana read it and said, “It’s not really short Jim…” While in most scenarios those are words that I would be very happy to hear from her, in this scenario I had to clarify. Jimz Shorts is designed as a site for me to write short stories about things that have happened in my life or are slightly fabricated. They are designed to be of the 10 minute or 2000ish words variety and hopefully they come with a point for reflection. They are not short as blog posts go. They are short as stories go. That being said I realize they are a bit longer than some readers might have to invest so I am committed to keep this Jimswhimz blog going also with the routine snippets of life. Here’s one now!

Do you think that God/The Universe has a sense of humor? That is a rhetorical question we throw around a lot in our house and the answer is always a resounding yes. Yesterday I was reminded of this absolute truth yet again. Like I do on many summer mornings I wore my flip flops to work. Usually that works out just fine. Three or four times a summer I forget to bring socks. Even the longest bearded hipster would agree that it is fashion faux pas to wear a tuxedo without socks. Thankfully I have a Nordstrom across the street from Joe’s.

My usual pattern is to rush over to Nordstrom after I realize that I don’t have any socks. In most cases I have already put on my tux so I walk across Grand Avenue wearing a tux and flip flops which is truly a sight to be seen. I always go ahead and buy a three pack of black Calvin Klein socks because a daily tuxedo wearing guy can never have too many extra pairs of black socks. Every time I’ve done this over the past ten years I take a little Nordstrom shopping bag from the clerk and opt for the printed receipt. To opt for the email receipt would definitively take longer. I’m pretty much always in no mood to wait so in this set of circumstances I’m downright antsy.

481px-Fools_Cap_(PSF)Yesterday as the clerk was ringing up my purchase I confidently declared, “I don’t need a bag and I don’t need either a printed or an email receipt!” I was going to take charge of this sock buying experience and make it go as quickly as possible. The clerk looked back at me and said, “No receipt at all sir?” At that point my mouth politely said “No thank you I’m going to wear them now” even while my inside voice quite literally formed the thought, “What kind of fool returns black socks?” It’s not like I bought the wrong color or size! Seriously dude?

Well about twenty minutes later I was walking around at Joe’s getting set up for the day and I noticed my brand new socks kept creeping down from my calf to my ankle. This to me is akin to having wet spaghetti noodle in between my toes from a personal comfort standpoint. I went to my backpack where I had put the other two pairs of socks. I looked at the label and saw, Calvin Klein no elastic socks – Designed for wearing with garters.

Are you kidding me? Where’s that damn bearded hipster now?And does he have any sock garters I can borrow? Oh well I thought, “I’ll be uncomfortable for the day, but after work I’ll take the socks back with my receipt and….”

As I realized the irony all I could do was throw my arms up air, glance to the heavens and for just a second it felt like somebody or something winked at me. Well I guess it’s better to be reminded that a moment playing the fool is far better than thinking oneself too wise. Nuff said Universe.



About Jim Herbert

I've been wanting to write my whole life. By age 45 it had amounted to nothing more than a storage locker of half full journals and a lot of unfulfilled dreams. Then Paris in the fall of 2011 happened. It was the catalyst I needed to consistently blog. At first I had a hard time hitting the publish button, but now two blog sites and over 300 posts later I'm hitting my stride. I'm also a budding speech writer. I've recently been heavily involved in the Chicago Storytelling scene and have also won the Chicago Toastmasters Area 66 International Speech Contest. Check out our website at for more details about the amazing things that are happening in my life. A book or two are nearing completion. With another Paris trip on tap for Easter of 2015 I can only imagine that there are Infinite Possibilities on the horizon!!!
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